When?

When did it begin,
Or may I say end;
I fell, yet I stood tall;
I died, yet I once lived for all.

But now I live as if dead;
No friends, no end
— I can no longer defend.

Am I alive, or dead?
I cant decide, nor can I pretend
To make amends … with anyone.

So then, do I live and struggle without end,
Or do I live as if I’m already dead?

For this life can spin into a barbaric trend,
Or end up leaving me lifeless and dead,
Even when I have tried —
To just get by.

God knows I died, and I have tried,
So I must decide
— do I live or die?

I won’t decide,
For either way
I’m dead;
Life passes by without end.

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